Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Slowly getting back to life

Last week I actually worked the whole week. It sucked. I was miserable at work and didn't do much. Sunday night my son was up sick and so I stayed home with him on Monday. Today he stayed home again but Jeff Allen took the day off. I really don't want to be at work. I'm just not feeling as if I can deal with this job. This isn't new. I actually started questioning back in October.

Last night I started working on resolutions. Hoping this is a good sign that I am trying to move on. Unfortunately, I was so tired I fell asleep right after I started making my list. Not sure that's a good sign!!

Monday, January 18, 2010

Overcoming the grief

Today I went back to work. I actually worked a whole day. Not very productive. Not very talkative. But I did it.

Jeff thinks that getting back into a routine will help make things better. Right now I can't see how. I just want to be home with my husband and kids. I don't want to talk to anyone or be around anyone else. Maybe I'm becoming depressed. Who knows.

Have a huge headache and just want to crawl in bed. Except they're working on the electric in my room. Probably a good thing. I don't want to become depressed and make things worse for my family. Lord this is hard.

Monday, January 11, 2010

Still going day by day

Everyday seems to be getting better but I could never imagine how hard it truly is to lose my mother. Went into work today for a few hours, but it's hard to sell life insurance right now. I started bawling and my boss sent me home- after we joked about how he never thought buying us pizza for lunch would be so tramautic for me! Right now I just want to be home with my husband and kids.

Saturday, January 2, 2010

Blog Break

Yesterday after I finished posting, I received a phone call that my mother passed away. Right now things are completely chaotic for reasons I've never spoke of on my blog. Day by day is my new mantra. It's all I can do.

Friday, January 1, 2010


The last week of the year is always so busy at my house. It starts with my brother in law's family staying with us Christmas night and leaving a few days later. His wife and I go shopping the day after and usually that's my one shopping trip for myself. This year I found a new winter jacket, scarf, gloves, pillows for our bed, a Bialetti coffee pot for Jeff, a purse, and various other small items.

Work was super busy as it's the end of the year and numbers had to be met. My boss waits to the last week to try and get policies so he can meet his numbers while the rest of us work hard all year getting policies. Next year I am saving some days and taking off the last week. Jeff and the kids are home and it would be nice to be home together.

Jeff went yesterday to get the electrical supplies to run wires for our bedroom. I still need to pick out paint colors. I know how I want the bedroom to look and achieving it will probably not happen! We're hoping to get the electric done tomorrow and then priming the walls tomorrow night. I also have to pick a floor so we can order it. I can't wait to have an actual bedroom.

I still haven't put together any resolutions. I want to work on improving myself as well as the lives of my family but not sure what that means or how to achieve it. But I love reading every one's goals. Maybe I'll just live vicariously through all you!! Best wishes for everyone this new 2010 year!